I have malocclusion, which means my teeth don’t line up correctly. I have an underbite that is slightly off center. This is somewhat of a problem for bunnies, because our teeth are constantly growing. We eat food (hay for example) that can easily wear down our teeth. So, nature decided that we can make up for this by having teeth that grow. It’s also why bunnies and similar mammals have instincts to chew. Unfortunately for me, my teeth don’t wear down. That means that twice a month, my mommy has to break out her dremel tool and shave off my teeth. Normally it would be done every 6 weeks or so, but unlike most bunnies, I don’t like to chew. I mean really, if I’m gonna chew something, I want it to be food. Who do people think they are fooling with these pieces of wood that “taste” like carrots? I know what a carrot tastes like, that freaking piece of wood ain’t it. So, I don’t chew, I don’t see the point. And that means that I have to have my teeth done every 2 weeks.
And I hate it. It’s horribly traumatic.
First, my mommy wraps me up in a towel so that I can’t move (thanks, human). She calls it a “bunny burrito.” Haha hahaha haha, that’s just sooooooooo funny. Only my face is allowed out, and sometimes I choke. Soooo funny, mommy. Anyway, then she takes a child’s toothbrush and puts the handle in my mouth to keep it open and give her access to my teeth. Then the tool comes in. And…..and….it’s like….it shakes my whole body. My head….my head vibrates. The tool is as big as I am!!! I’m just so scared of it. I HATE IT!!!
Mommy usually lets me hide under the towel for a few minutes after it’s over. And sometimes she’ll hold me. Then she’ll give me oats, which doesn’t really make up for it, but they are yummy. I get that I’d be dead if she didn’t do it. And any other bunny owner would have killed me (or “put me down” as humans say). And given the choice of Mommy doing it or a vet doing it, I choose Mommy. But still, it’s just so so scary. Fortunately, I have kind of a crappy short term memory, so it doesn’t take long for me to forget and become Abigail again.